How to Ditch the Guilt

Last week, I challenged you to try asking yourself “Is it true"? And, I guess I also challenged you to take advantage of my offer of a free coaching call. Those challenges stand. Keep going. You may just be the top scorer on this pinball machine of growth.

Anyway, I've been thinking a lot about how we can't give people what we don't have. This comes up a lot when clients talk about their experiences with family. They're wanting things from parents, siblings, kids that they can't get because the people in their life DON'T have them. Maybe that describes a relationship you have in your life? The hard truth is that in this situation you get to do 2 things that are simple, but not easy. And, here's the kicker, at first, they're going to feel shitty. You get to feel all your feelings about what you're wanting and lacking. And then, you get to set boundaries. I know, fun as hell. But, I promise, it will feel amazing sooner than you can imagine.

I've actually been finding myself on the other end of this dynamic. I've been wanting to give things to people I love that I don't have YET. I'm dealing more with the physical and the financial than the emotional in my own life right now. But, my beliefs about it are what I can control. It lowkey sucks. This all goes back to us staying rooted in reality. In remembering that while not everything happens for a reason, everything that is happening is exactly what should be happening. Our role is just to have our eyes- and when we can, our hearts- open to it all. I'm doing everything I can to have all the things I want. But right now, the only room I have for negotiating is with my expectations and beliefs about myself and what I currently have to give.

Yes, I know. Woo. Woo. Especially with everything that is going on in our world. But sit with it for a little bit.

Hate everything I just said? Email me. Write it all down. You'll be glad you did.

Need a little reminder that you’re worthy with all the challenging things going on? Check out this painting, that I call Crown of Worthiness. It came in a mini version, but that one got claimed last week. It's got Basquiat vibes and a pretty simple (but powerful) message.

If you need another reminder of your worthiness, check out this video of me writing out my own self-love notes. I wrote about this a couple weeks ago. (See my Insta account for more of these self-love notes. It's a thing.) If you haven’t written a love note to yourself, do it this week. Just one little “I love you” on a post it or a scrap of paper. Put it where you can see it and read it at least once every day. If you get really brave, say it to yourself in the mirror. I know…cringe. Do it anyway. You’ll see why when you do it enough that the cringe factor diminishes a bit. Let me know what you think.

I think these two reminders are just what you need with everything you've got going on.